50 Shades of Beige

I think that's what I'd call my book...
50 Shades of Beige: What Everyone Except Me Already Knew

It would probably be a compilation of all the bullshit advice I've given people and how I came to learn it over and over again, but differently each time.

Maybe one of the chapters would be:

"You'll Never Make Anyone Happy"
(That's how it was recently put to me so succinctly by a friend of mine and they were absolutely correct.)

It might be outlined like this:

You ARE responsible for your own happiness.

You are NOT responsible for anyone else's happiness.

You ARE responsible for your actions.

You are NOT responsible for anyone else's.

Why carrying the burden of someone else's happiness is unfair to you.

How carrying the burden of someone else's happiness is unfair to them.

The freedom of failing and then giving up.

Yep.

I think that would pretty much cover the major points, but there would be a great deal of material in each of those points.

None of which will I afford you here.

But here's the chapter summary:

If you want to find yourself becoming something you never imagined you could and you want the people around you to treat you the way you never thought they would, live you're life and make every decision like you're the one that can make them happy. Then have the expectation that they are doing the same for you as intensely as you are.
Know that they also believe that they are the ones that will make you happy, as though they would, could or were at all as concerned about it as you.

This I have learned, is a certain way to find yourself in a really fucked place, a really fucked up person, and surrounded by other fucked up people.

And ALL of it will fall back on you at some point.

This is something that everyone already knows and will learn over and over again if they're anything like me and that's why it would be in my book.

Of course, this is only one way of many to fail, and I have a whole blog right here with many others if you're looking. All of them based on personal experience.

But failing doesn't make you a failure.
That's what I tell myself anyway.

That said, if you aren't actually looking for ways to fail, in this particular case, simply unload the undue burden.

Carry and own your shit and yours alone, and let / make others do the same.

You'll all be better for it and who knows the situation just might be reversible, but who really knows...

Solo Cristo Salva
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