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Sunday, October 23, 2011

Dismantling the American Jesus

Dismantling the American Jesus

by Roberto Esponja on Sunday, October 23, 2011 at 11:12pm ·
This is not what I intended this to be; it isn't even the second or third thing I thought it would possibly be. I am now simply calling it, Dismantling the American Jesus, and I may even add Pt 1 to that as it may turn out to be a multi-part work, but...it may end in the next 5 minutes, who knows....

Some things you should know up front:

I am not a person that is prone to regurgitating pre-formulated thoughts, or who likes to resort to cliché/path of least resistance type thinking.

I believe that if you can not be honest then you can not be anything that is worthy of being, for it will all be built on the shaky foundation of lies and will eventually crumble under its own weight.

The blessing being the curse as it often is, I have once more been given cause to think. So...here is my honest thinking submitted for your reading, once more.

It is, as usual, a stream of thought, complete with typos and spelling errors. Clearly I need an editor, so try to overlook these things and see my point through them. Remember, this a couch more than a classroom.

I post here and on my blog, so you may interject, and comment anonymously. I don't expect that anyone would care to be as "out there" as I am told that I am.

And so it begins:

I have been thinking a good deal lately about failure in the context of living out one’s faith…

We are a success driven culture, it is the nature of the free enterprise culture to be so. I have seen (and sadly have been guilty of myself) many believers shunned by other believers who might be failing, or who have, in a very limited view, failed for fear of being dragged into failure as well. It is shameful, and this is not the way of the Jesus I find in the bible, regarding those who may stumble in their pursuit of righteousness, nor should it be ours.

Jesus lived among the sinners, was shunned by the self-righteous religious leaders of his own day for doing so, rejected and labeled as a failure. He dared to challenge the traditional religious’ (and political hierarchy contained within) concepts of righteousness in pointing out that simply meeting the letter of the law was not by any means embracing the heart of the intention behind the law. In challenging them to re-think their practices, and examine their hearts, they understood that this would be the undoing of their greatest source of self-pride, the power structure, and the financial gain they enjoyed so greatly, by the strict regulation and religious burden on those who’s desire was truly that of God’s heart. At the outset, they knew he must be silenced, and when unable to outsmart him in religion, crucifixion suited the cause just fine.

We will find the same is true of many of the “religious” in our own day, and the greater the effect we have in causing people to think and change, the more vocal and forceful the protests will be.

In caring for the sinner, Jesus suffered with and for them, then and us as well today. Even knowing the depth of their failures, past, present and future, Jesus continued to see and treat people for their potential so that they too might realize it within themselves.

Consider Peter, while he was passionate, this emotion also drove his decisions in which ever way the wind blew. The other apostles must have seen this in instability him, and probably saw it as a jab of sorts, when Jesus called him the rock. Not unlike nicknaming an overweight person slim.

This was not the case at all though. Jesus was sincere in his renaming of Peter, because he alone knew the depth of failure Peter would reach, even before calling him Peter. (Petra, the rock, Peter) He told Peter in advance that he would deny Jesus 3 times. Peter refused to believe such a thing, but to his own shame Peter did in fact do. But Jesus did not hold this foreknown or previous failures against him, for he told Peter that upon this rock (Peter) he would build his church, and so he did.

Peter's identity was in Jesus, and Jesus in believing the best of Peter without keeping score of his failures, allowed Peter to do things, which Peter might never have done, or even considered as possible, on his own strength. Amazing...

I believe that this is how we too are viewed by Jesus, and we might not settle for spiritual mediocrity in our lives, but go on to accomplish far more for the kingdom if we were to find our own identity in Christ and believe this of ourselves.

This idealistic attitude runs contrary to human nature's quest for self-preservation and prosperity, and it is certainly counter to our American culture, because in doing so we may indeed find ourselves in situations where by we too suffer for the failures of others (on many different levels) by actually suffering with them. I believe that by showing compassion to others and making their failures our own, their growth through those difficult times would foster at least some degree of growth within ourselves for simply having done so. If our identity is truly realized through Jesus then it is our calling. For is that not the work of the cross, a suffering for the failure of others?

I believe that most of the answers we struggle with are in large part due to the manner in which we approach our questions. A good deal can be discerned about a person's level of maturity or depth of understanding by the manner in which their questions are posed. We are wise to remember as believers however that we are the finite attempting to pursue the infinite, the imperfect creation in pursuit of our perfect creator, a difficult task indeed, and impossible by our own merits!

In light of this, we must keep in mind that we are certain to fail at some point or another, along the way, and probably often.

Show me a man that has not failed, and I will show you a man that has not tried.

If in our lives we wish to simply avoid failure, then all we must do is simply avoid success, and I'm afraid this is the spiritual state of many believers, including myself at times. We expect very little from God, and ask that he return the favor. We have settled for being luke warm, and Christ addresses that state as well in a far more than unfavorable way.

Our modern culture is one of instant gratification, and often our determination of failure, is such because we fail see the realization of success manifested within reference to our own imagined ideals of what success is, and within our own brief life spans. This is not how success and failure work in a spiritual context.

Success and failure cannot, if we are believers in God's sovereignty, be concluded merely by our limited observation and short sightedness, it must be considered as part of the whole, a much larger picture (God's purpose), of which we have a very limited view.

God, being eternal is not limited to time. Failure and success, as it were, is not realized in a given moment, or within anyone's individual accomplishments, it is rather realized within the context of eternity and its part in achieving his ultimate purpose.

We might consider "the failure of one the failure of all, and the success of one the success of all" in choosing or failing, to support one another in either.

In this process then, I have opted to go contrary to what I see as the "normal" approach, by focusing on failure more than success. Doing so has proven to be a very large and complicated task. My original intention was to examine the life of Moses, who experienced a great number of failures and successes, while being quite clever and insightful. I have once again foiled my own plan however, and the process has allowed me to make only some very basic, general observations.

Failure is not an option...

Often times not only is failure AN option, it is THE option, as it is required for our growth and in achieving God's purpose. Especially when it is considered within the context of salvation, recognizing and admitting failure by our own strengths is mandatory, or we negate the mission of Jesus himself.

I we could do anything but fail, even in our best attempts at righteousness, then the cross has no meaning.

I find it quite comforting that the bible is so free in exemplifying the failures of so many of its heroes, and in this regard I find that I do often look at the life of Moses.

God instructed Moses to return to his homeland of Egypt, from which he fled as a murderer years prior. He told Moses to talk to Pharaoh, instructing him to request that he let the Hebrews (slaves at the time) go into the wilderness to have a feast in honor of their God. However, and this is the part I really am inspired by, God also tells Moses that he will fail. Get it? It was a part of the plan; Moses would, as a mandatory part of accomplishing God's will, FAIL! He in fact, failed as a part of God's plan many times, and I believe so do we.

God's ways being higher than ours ways, and his thoughts higher than our thoughts, it is he that will have the final determination in defining our successes or failures, and it is ultimately not within our control. While success rather than failure is our goal, it is our perception of their purpose that will determine our response to these situations and what we do with them, and in the grand scheme what we perceive as either may be totally incorrect.

It seems to me we are more prone to introspection, thinking, learning and growing into maturity through our discomforts and afflictions, more so than we are in our comfort and success, as those seem more often to create within us complacency, self-centeredness, and pride. It is rare to recognize our need for God when we are comfortable, but in our failures we recognize our hopelessness and cry out to him.

On the return from a short-term mission trip to impoverished Mexico, I asked the prople around me what one thing they walked away with. The consistently the answers were based in gratitude for the affluent American lifestyle. This was deeply saddening to me because not one person seemed to notice the passionate worship and deep level of commitment to faith these people possessed.

Is our vision so focused on material wealth that we are blinded to our spiritual poverty?

As we tend to require so much of it ourselves in the process, failure is also a great catalyst for learning the importance of extending grace and mercy in order to encourage others to press forward as well, not accepting failure as defeat, but as part of a process. Many times I have received such encouragement, when it would have been far easier to be crushed by judgment and condemnation, regardless of how accurate those assertions may have been. (Sadly though, the opposite has also been the case far too often, and it has proven to be most disheartening and disillusioning when un-grace is so generously distributed by those claiming the name of Christ.)

We may view many failures as successes in a certain sense, both for others and ourselves if only in that regard. Often times in extending the opportunity for growth to others we too seem to grow.

Again, we can look to Jesus to see the attitude of non-judgment very clearly exemplified for us, as a pattern for living, which we should strive to attain. I will say though, that in looking to Jesus as our example we should look at the bigger picture, not expecting that the graces and mercies we extend will, as a matter of natural course, be returned, for we too will at times fail to do the same.

We should also recognize at this point, that Christ was very good to point out sin as the root cause for many afflictions, calling for repentance rather than doling out the judgment that he alone would have been justified to administer or by addressing the mere symptoms of sin without also addressing the underlying cause.

We are often people who sparingly extend our graces and mercies. When we do it is primarily based on the realization that within our own lives, we require the same. Compassion is consequently often born out of our own life experiences, and a person failing to encompass these things has most likely not recognized them having been or being extended to them, or perhaps even their need for them.

In some cases the failure to extend these graces may in fact just be a symptom of issues people are dealing with internally. On a darker note, and please forgive me, they may in fact not be believers at heart. Most likely you will never know these last two, and it will be up to you to extend the grace you have not been afforded and move on.

Love does not keep score, and you may find one day that you too (heaven forbid) are that person.

Jesus was generous to extend these things to those who asked sincerely, and he alone knew the extent of our sad human condition in doing so.

Part 2 Hang on, it's going to be a bumpy ride...

I used to get quite frustrated that many of the answers that Jesus gave in response to (seemingly) very direct questions, were often vague shadows of answers, portrayed in stories and left open for interpretation. I was dumbfounded when I read his response for doing so as being so that some would indeed not understand them. This seemed unfair and contrary to the loving Jesus I worshipped. I have found a certain understanding of this, however, through my own experiences.

Many of the answers we seek cannot be presented to us as mere formulas for success. There is usually a much larger picture that we fail to comprehend in asking many of our questions and the nature of many of the answers we seek are a result of our desire to relieve symptoms, rather than solving the root cause of them. As I previously touched on, Jesus did not allow this as an option, and does not address our problems without also addressing their underlying causes.

This is a blessing in my opinion, as it seems God is always good to give us what he knows we need, rather than what we seek as a result of our perceived needs. Anyone with children will understand the frustration of them, when instead of candy we offer a meal, or instead of watching a late night movie they must go to bed. They cannot understand why their greater good is entirely contrary to their wishes. We too often operate as children when it comes to our requests of God to meet "our needs".

Although many situations are the same in nature, no two situations are really ever the same in circumstance if/when we are discussing those in which people are involved. That being the case, even if it is only we who are involved in those situations, there is again the one person involved, with skewed and limited perspectives, ourselves.

With that being said, I have come to a couple of conclusions, over the years.

1) There are answers in life that can be found, but that the simple imparting wisdom will not satisfy.

In many instances, unless we can work through the given situation that has made us aware of our need for such an answer, we would not accept, recognize, or comprehend these answers. These are often answers that risk rejection by trying to simply explain them, without having experienced them firsthand. However sincere our desire to help may be, we do a certain dis-service when we try to do so.

To grow in our maturity of anything, but especially in our faith, is a process more than a product, and so we must see one step through to its end, before we can proceed to the next.

2) I have found that youth, either chronologically or in regard to our spiritual quest, affords us a strong certainty of things which our later experiences and maturity will simply not allow.

Immaturity would have us believe that the world is quite small, and is comprised primarily of what we perceive it to be by our own senses.

Children can be cruel and lacking in compassion. By virtue of their own limited experiences they simply cannot understand or relate to the needs of others, or what it takes as an adult to meet those needs. They assume the perspective of others must be the same as their own, if they consider those things at all, because of their ignorance. Any parent knows, and forgives this, because that's how children are and it's a part of the process of growing into maturity.

The other complicating factor in children is that they tend to paint the world with the brush of their own experience. My experience is that of being born into the American culture. To be born again in large part to being, and being surrounded by purely cultural Christians. Christians by proxy.

The faith we have been handed by our predecessors, is a faith that is so intertwined with the American dream and political agendas, that the deciphering and separation of the biblical Jesus and the American Jesus is almost impossible if our reliance is strictly based in the teachings of popular "Christian" celebrities, and even sincere but duped local leaders and teachers.

I have found that even among people who seem to see themselves as being fairly knowledgeable about the bible and its teachings, however "good" their intention, feel that their understanding of scripture is most certainly the "correct" meaning of any given text in the bible.

While I certainly wouldn't expect anyone to profess belief in something they actually didn't, what I have found is that many of these folks seem to read into the bibles teachings what isn't there by failing to remove their personal and political agendas at the outset. Perhaps not consciously, they in effect make their cause God's cause, when God's cause should be theirs. In doing so they put themselves in a very scary position of divine judgment for misrepresenting God and his word.

Although we fancy ourselves to be independent thinkers very few of us actually take the time or extend the effort to read and understand the very scriptures we profess to believe. Because we profess but don't practice our faith we are easily convinced to follow blindly, those who would lead us astray.

I'm certain that I too must be guilty of all of this to a large degree, although I struggle daily not to be.

We live in a culture that allows, encourages, and rewards non-thinkers.

We hold fame to be a virtue, give credit where it is not due, and celebrate the accomplishments of those that have accomplished nothing. We are a shallow people often believing that in parroting the thoughts of other popular and apparently more intelligent people that we too will appear to be thinking independently, as they are, and in doing wrongly esteem ourselves quite highly.

This thinking is as immature as seeking acceptance from your peers by wearing the t-shirt of a band, or dawning a logo as to provide instant status and credibility, simply by association. Sadly, we seem to buy in to this logic quite a bit as well.

So, where am I going with all of this?

Well In considering the determination of success and failure, as Christians we fail when we do not seek. While it is clearly good to seek teaching, we must also validate that teaching with our own study and pursuit of God's heart in doing so.

To me, as a believer, this is the only true failure. All other failures are merely stepping stone failures. The sorts of failures that can prepare us for real success when we learn from them whatever it is God intends to teach us as a result.

These are the sorts of failures contained within scripture, for it is not God who fails, but we who fail when we seek to live by our own wisdom and strength instead of searching for and submitting to God's providence.

The highest and most honorable success we may hope to have is that of being used by God for the manifestation of his glory and work through our lives. If this is our goal then failure is only a part of the process in finding success.

I will close with these final thoughts:

1) One failure may be the catalyst to a great number of later successes, but one success may require many failures before coming to fruition.

2) Our greatest successes will be our greatest failures if Christ alone is not at the center of them.

Let your ultimate hope lie in the ultimate hope...
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  • Sean Stinson likes this.
  • 5 shares

    • Roberto Esponja If you wish to reply anonymously please visit my blog.

    • Joe Brackman
      The thing that's bugging me, to be honest, is the idea of the "American Jesus" being so messed up. Sure, there are plenty of problems in the church in America, but there are also a ton of amazing saints here who are doing God's work faithfully. I've gotten tired of the "you're doing it wrong" crowd who, frankly, slander their brothers in the Lord in America (and think the rest of the world is somehow fully sanctified, to rely on their telling--it's a 'grass is greener' kind of thing). You're not exactly doing that, but it's triggering me. Maybe choose a different name, or a different theme, and I, for one, might be more open. Your writing is lucid, frank, and soul-baring, as usual, and I like it.


    • Roberto Esponja
      I totally agree, there are a ton of great things happening within the Christian community. Many good works of service being done in with the glory being placed appropriately.


      My only real point in naming it such is to contrast the cultural versus the biblical Jesus, as there are quite a few people who would sincerely believe they can opt to be Christians by osmosis, rather than recognizing the need to be Christians in practice.

      I think without a stark contrast, and perhaps not even with one, many people are apt to many faults in others and fail to recognize these things within themselves.

      It is in fact why I included references to myself as also being a part of the problem. (passive protesting on fb notes and blogs).

      I will consider your thoughts however, because while my aim isn't necessarily to avoid offense, to cause it by the wrong application is certainly not what I am trying to do.

      This also the partial reasoning in writing this response, as an encouragement to believers that may be struggling.

      Thanks Joe Brackman


    • Roberto Esponja BTW, seriously, thanks for taking time out to read and reply. I really appreciate the feedback.

    • Joe Brackman
      Sure, and I read a lot of truth here in your words. I just think the broadbrush potential of "American Jesus" is a bit dangerous.


      Speaking of including yourself in the criticism, I love that part of Blue Like Jazz where Miller is at some protest decrying some sort of evil, and then he, introspectively, realizes that his own evil heart is part of the problem. Amen, dude.

      Love you, brother. You are truly humble, teachable, and honest. Love it.


    • Luke Pierson solus Christus

    • David Steinbrenner
      What the heck. Let me be a dissenting voice...sort of. I completely agree that there are many many faithful Christians in faithful communities that are serving Christ through serving the world and others and they often go unnoticed (Flashes of the gospel, like Jesus, are often not born on the heights of flashy power in Rome, but in the tiniest of backwater places like Bethlehem). It can be too easy and lazy for folks to go ahead and just pick on the Church and what a failure it is. However, that is not what Roberto has done in this essay (and Joe, I know you are not saying that he did). I think that the important thing to recognize in all of this is that the American Jesus as Roberto is calling "him"/it is NOT the same person/thing as the Jesus proclaimed in Scripture by the worldwide/catholic Church that has carried and imperfectly embodied the Good News of Jesus. I do think that because of America's particular history and founding that the Church in America and the American society that embodies Americanism ended up co-opting each other (The problem with this is Jesus does not seem to offer the option of his sharing his Lordship with Enlightenment philosophy and the cultural patterns wedded to it. Remember in the story of Elijah and the Baal prophets, Ahab and Israel did not abandon or stop worshiping YHWH. The problem was they became syncrenistic and started worshiping Baal IN ADDITION TO YHWH to hedge their bets against the uncertainties in life and for the sake of political relationships with the Phoneticians via Jezebel.) So, blah blah blah, what i am trying to say is that the American Jesus--or the Canadian Jesus or British Jesus or Columbian Jesus or any other Jesus that has been co-opted by rulers and societies for the sake of power and coercion--should be criticized and called out heavily. Again, how can this be in light of all of the good things I have acknowledged the Church has done and does in America? Because criticizing the American Jesus is NOT criticizing the Jesus of Scripture proclaimed by the Church. I can appreciate in our cultural context that even using the language of American Jesus to criticize the syncretic Christianity around us might seem provocative or button-pushing, but I cannot think of anymore accurate language to use, nor any language that is more jarring to get one to stop and think about how we all--myself included--worship at the alter of Baal without even realizing it. So, hats off to the Roberto article!


    • Roberto Esponja For the record, I say American Jesus, because I am an American. Were I in Canada, or any of those other places, I would have used that name instead, because I have made sure to include myslef in the critisim.

    • Roberto Esponja Well stated by the way.

    • David Steinbrenner Thanks. This all reminds me of that analogy of inoculation. I cannot remember who said it, but someone stated that the problem that we have in the West is that we have been inoculated with a weak enough of a strain of Christianity that we are now almost immune to full-strength real thing.

Saturday, October 1, 2011

10 Seconds of Love

10 Seconds of Love...

by Roberto Esponja on Saturday, October 1, 2011 at 3:22am ·
In case it's too much effort to visit my blog: http://phreshwater01.blogspot.com/2011/10/10-seconds-of-love_01.html

Well, as usual I have been inspired via facebook status and response. It's good to write again. It's a far better kind of tired than pain gives me...

What is it that makes people of any faith or even a professed lack there of say, "Everything happens for a reason."?

Do we really think that? Or do we just wish it to be so very badly?

And why don't we then continue this line of reasoning when things seem to go our way as well?

If "Everything happens for a reason." don't those things happen for a reason too?


Status:
Everything in life happens for a reason,we may not understand why but we must remain positive and focused.Stay focused on your dreams and goals friends,they will happen...

Response:
You have made me think, for that I thank you. So, let me start by saying, I totally agree with your first sentence. However, if one were to really stop, and consider the enormity of the concept that this statement suggests, I wonder if so many who utter these same words would be so flippant in their pursuit of understanding the one orchestrating these very same reasons. I believe we are far more than remiss if we fail in doing so, for it stating that "Everything happens for a reason." gives everything a purpose, seeming to suggest a creator, an omniscient deity...God if you will.

With that omniscient deity in mind, it seems wise for us to be flexible in the pursuit of our perception of what is best for us, bending, and ideally completely yielding to the will of said orchestrator, to attain what is actually best for us.  For just as we may not understand the reasoning behind events as we see them, we may also fail in recognizing the direction which we are being moved as a result of these events.

Consequently, it seems we run the very real risk of missing far greater opportunities and experiences than we might ever have imagined possible, simply for their not being within our own finite concept of how things should be and apparently not fitting within the rigid plans created within our own narrow visions and intentions.

In my limited experience, I have found that our positivity can only be maintained for the duration that our hope will sustain it. The one does not exist without the other. Take away a person's hope and I would be hard pressed to think you could find much for positive thinking in its absence.

Hope by its very nature, is not self sustaining for very long even in the strongest of wills. The statement that "everything happens for a reason which we may not understand" also seems, to me, to acknowledge that we are not in control and thus not self-sustained/reliant in the final outcome of events. So, where (or in what) we place that crucial hope is (in multiple senses) of grave importance if our desire is in deed (as well as word), to be sustained for the duration of our lives.

All that being said, it seems it would be wise for us to be extremely wary of placing a greater hope in the creation (more specifically ourselves) rather than acknowledging our own vast, inherent need by placing our hope solely in the creator. For while the former is finite and ever changing, the later is infinite and never changing.

Regardless of the circumstances we may be facing, however bad or good we may view them to be, the choice of hope in one source is certain defeat, but to place our hope in the other, certain victory.

So yes, I while I believe everything happens for a reason, I also happen to believe it happens for A singular, and much larger reason. Glory be to God.

d(-_-)b
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Monday, July 25, 2011

All In (Pt. 1) A little background before we dig in

All In (Pt. 1) A little background before we dig in...

by Roberto Esponja on Saturday, June 25, 2011 at 2:51am ·
Anonymous responses can be made at my blog: http://phreshwater01.blogspot.com/2011/06/all-in-pt-1.html

(It's 3.05 am, I'm tired. I didn't edit anything, I barely used spell check. You'll just have to get over that, it's probably close enough, you'll figure it out.)
________________________________________________________________________
Pt. 1 The Bible: 66 of the least read and most misquoted classics...

One of the first rules of effective writing, at least to me, is not to state the obvious. That said however, I don't really know who my audience is. In fact for a good while, I didn't even know I had an audience. Mind you, not that I set out to have one. I, not unlike many others, use writing as a means of therapy (of sorts) as it helps me to see my thoughts expressed and I seem to think a little more clearly like this. I have written my thoughts for my own clarification for years now and have not shared them, recently however I have felt compelled to make those thoughts available. I'm not entirely sure quite why, as it seems to be costing me a good deal more than I thought it would on a personal level.

So, I am about to violate the a fore mentioned rule, simply to make things clear to those who may read this, but not really know me.

I am without a doubt a truth seeker, and in Jesus I believe I have found that truth. Outside of the Bible and and few mentions of him by the Jewish historian Josephus, we don't find much. So, we can't really know Jesus outside of reading the ever dreaded, archaic and boring Bible. I'm certain this is by design. (By the way, those terrible feelings subside once you take an active interest in it.)

Consequently, while I don't site my specific references, a good deal of what I write can actually be found in the Bible, and stated much more clearly, without my take on its meaning.

For your own sake I would encourage you, please, to look for yourselves at the text through the lens of your own understanding, rather than taking my thoughts and opinions (or anyone's for that matter) as factual teaching. This, as I said, was never my intent. I am just one rather messed up guy, trying to figure these things out. Again, go to the source, and ask God to reveal His truth to you. It is clearly stated within the Bible many times over that God will not refuse your request of such.

Our failure in doing so has been the key to success for many cults.

Anyway, that said, I know a good deal of the people who read this probably won't take that advice. Religion has been substituted for faith in many of our lives, and religion itself serves many crushing blows. I speak from experience, but would encourage you to press on if your quest is in deed for truth. Know that this too was problem that Jesus dealt sternly with and offered no kind words to those who would crush the faith of others under the burden of religion.

Even of  those that do take this advice, many will ask questions of God, for which the answers will prove to be difficult, or perhaps even impossible for them to accept or understand. (Jesus talks about this too.) I believe this is natural and happens whenever the finite attempts understanding of the infinite. I too have been (and still am) there, and I don't think that ever ends. To you however, I would offer this feeble attempt at encouragement; those who would not follow, can not then expect to be lead.

Of course, God will do what He sees fit, and the Bible too is filled with those for whom the answers proved to be too difficult at the time, and yet God used them as well.  I certainly could not have foreseen Him using me as he has, and to what ultimate end I may never know.

Rest assured, that you matter greatly, to both your creator and those around you. You never know who is watching or listening to you as their example and taking those things to heart. As a father, this point is shown to me in a very tangible way, but it was very much driven home to me one desperate night when I heard what I now call the five words that saved my life, "I'm glad I met you." But that's a whole other story. Suffice to say, only God knows a man's heart and the ultimate impact we have on others.

If only to that end, we owe it to ourselves and others to be the best that we can be. To my understanding, part of being the best that we can be is by seeking to know our creator, and our purpose in him through our own experiences. The best is what He desires and created for us for, however unnaturally that path may seem to take us, I do not believe we were created for the sort of mediocrity which we seem content to settle for. I have addressed this, to a degree, in many of my previous notes and so will expound not further here.

None of this is why I started writing tonight, but thought that it was good background for you to have before starting my actual intended subject.

Beer number one finished, cigar now half gone...beer number two now opened, I will continue...on to part 2

d(-_-)b
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Saturday, July 9, 2011

Breathe The Breath of Life

Breathe The Breath of Life

by Roberto Esponja on Saturday, July 9, 2011 at 11:16am ·
Albert Einstein once said something along the lines of,"How could I see all this and NOT believe in God?" That's my world.

Here is the story of Blythe Day 1 (Long story short)

During labor, we lost the heartbeat in the monitor a few times, but figured that was due to it being in the wrong position, or movement, and so weren't too worried. When she was born, she was white and limp without a heartbeat, although I saw her eyes moving, she was simply, at that point, waiting for death.

(I still see it in my mind's eye in slow motion, with those piercing eyes looking directly at me, helpless...It was the worst feeling.)

That is until a nurse ran in and said,"Wait! I just read about this in a magazine!" Basically, she was born without blood as the umbilical cord had somehow suctioned it out. Life threatening to both mother and child. Until recently (at that point) children born in this state, were handed to their parents to say their final good byes.

The nurse told us there was no heart beat because the heart had nothing to pump. They pumped her full of saline and BINGO Heartbeat!

A few transfusions and some time in ICU later, and she was ready to go home.

They said they didn't know how long she had been without oxygen, or blood, so they didn't know the extent of the damage, nor would they possibly, until she was older. They told us to hope for the best and prepare for the worst.

13 years later and she's doing just great, not apparently any worse than the rest of us. Probably even better!

The name Blythe, which we had picked previously, we learned means "Filled with the Spirit of God", the breath of life.

I have lead a miraculous life, it is probably the only reason I trust God, even as little as I seem to.
..So, how could I see all this and NOT believe in God?



d(-_-)b

Wednesday, July 6, 2011

Tuesday, July 5, 2011

Jesus, La Migra, and Victor Hugo

Jesus, La Migra, and Victor Hugo

Originally posted by Roberto Esponja on Tuesday, July 5, 2011 at 3:45am ·
From my blog: http://phreshwater01.blogspot.com/2011/07/jesus-and-la-migra.html


I spent most of my growing up years in Mesa, AZ. I lived about a block and a half from the Mormon Temple. Mesa's Mormon population at the time was only marginally out numbered by the Catholics, and I was neither. Religion to my world did not exist until the summer of my 9th-10th grade year.


We, my mom, step-dad, sister, and I, lived in a 2 bedroom 1 bathroom house built in 1927. We fixed up the basement and called it my room, which was fine because up to that point, I had reluctantly and miserably shared a room with my sister.


The exterior of our house was made of plaster and slat board, and the interior walls were also plaster. The walls were no thicker than the doors were and there was no insulation, heck for that matter there was no air conditioning or heating either. We had a swamp cooler and a space heater…that was it. It got really hot, and it got really cold.


The old station wagon we had was the second car I recall us ever having, and it came years after our first which we had only a short while. We didn't drive anywhere we didn't have to so, if you couldn't bus it, bike it, or walk it, you weren't going (or I wasn't at least). Bus lines at that point were nonexistent in Mesa, as far as I could tell, so I got around on a homemade bike (Red with black handlebars, I thought I was pretty cool), and by skateboard.


My normal attire consisted of out dated thrift store clothing, which was fine by me, as it never occurred to me that other options were available. Even if they were for others, they certainly weren't for me.


I later learned that I was referred to by some as "the poorest kid in Mesa". Growing up I felt a lot of things, but poor was not among them. I had no concept of poor or rich, I just thought other people lived other ways and comparison in that regard wasn't something that I did until later in life.


Growing up "poor" in Mesa, I wasn't really all that selective about my friends. In Junior High School, I became aware that I certainly wasn't one of the popular kids, but I wasn't overly concerned with making efforts in becoming so. I don't know why, I just didn't want what they had.


As a result of my “social indiscretion”, I was friends with, among many others (for example the small percentage of Black kids residing in Mesa) the kids of illegal immigrants. I didn't know that's what they were, they were just my friends. They lived differently than I did, but heck, everybody else did too.


As friends of that age do, we studied together, I ate dinners at their houses, slept over, all the normal stuff. It never crossed my mind to wonder why I had to have my friends translate anytime I spoke to their parents or even why they didn't speak English, as many other people did. It simply was just that way to me and it wasn't something I ever thought to question at the time.


Of all these friends, I am saddened to say I remember the name of only one, Victor Hugo. Man, I thought he was cool. I don't recall why now, and probably couldn't have told you why then, I just did, and I'm still a lot like that.


His mom could cook! She was the nicest lady, and although Victor talked about his dad, even when he was supposedly home, I never saw him.


 

WAIT! Are those...can it possibly be...PEOPLE?! I recall the first time I ever heard the words, "LA MIGRA!".


I was at Victor's house, when a man ran through the court yelling it. We were outside and I saw people scrambling and running. Victor ran inside and I followed, he said to his mom, among other things I didn't understand, those same words, "la migra". I didn't know what was said to his mom, I didn't know what was happening, but I saw his mom leave immediately, panicked. I saw fear in her eyes as she kissed him goodbye.


Victor and I then went about doing, well whatever it was I don't know, and I mustered up the courage to ask him what had just happened. I had noticed the place, every place, was like a ghost town in a matter of minutes and I was thoroughly confused.


He then explained to me...la migra. That he didn't need to hide, although his family did, because he was born a citizen. It is only now as a parent, that I can imagine the depth of the fears that must have been going on inside his mother as she said goodbye, and took what very well might have been her last look at her child.


In the end, that time at least, it worked out. I went home but saw Victor at school and he told me his mom had returned, although not everyone was nearly so lucky.


It was from that day I understood why certain friends were in school one day and mysteriously gone the next. I didn't pick up on a lot of things as a kid, and it never occurred to me to think about the larger impact these regular occurrences must have had on Victor as well. Like most kids I only sought to understand those things that seemed to impact me.


Eventually Victor disappeared too. I don't know what happened to him, I only know that one day my good friend was just gone.


Clearly, I still think about him once in a while.


That's tough stuff as a kid and it left a huge impression on me. Until tonight, I had really only thought of it as one more of many episodes in my life. That is until the issue of illegal immigration came up as a rather odd response to a facebook post I made. I'll spare you the details, but I began to see this experience in a "spiritual light" if you will. I began to wonder how Christians (most specifically me) could reconcile this with their faith and concluded this:


I am afraid that a good many of us have not left that childish mentality, I described above,  in only being concerned with those this things that seem to impact us. As Americans, we are used to a certain lifestyle, a lifestyle that only cheap disposable laborers can afford us. I won't even mention our roll in human trafficking, and the sex industry that actually sustains these many of these cultures.


A good deal of that we put out of our view, so we can live guilt free by not having to directly face the very real consequences our affluence imposes on others. Occasionally though, some of that cheap labor has to be done here on our own soil. We protest the folks that come here to do it, but we turn a blind eye every time we purchase products that are affordable to us only because we are able to pay these "unskilled" laborers non-livable wages, and then ship them back to the country they fled, when we deem it necessary to do so.


However...As long as we separate "us" from "them", it is easy to see "them" as mere political agendas, a liability to our assets. "They" are nameless faceless draws upon "our" limited resources taking from "us" what "we" feel entitled to.


Getting to know "them", living with "them", gives the liability a face, a name,  and a story, and "they" cease to be political agendas, "they" then become to "us" what "they" always were, people of inherent God given worth and "they" then, become one of "us".


There’s a certain book that has a good deal to say about our atrocities...(emphasis mine)
_________________________________________________________
"There was a rich man who was clothed in purple and fine linen and who feasted sumptuously every day. And at his gate was laid a poor man named Lazarus, covered with sores, who desired to be fed with what fell from the rich man’s table. Moreover, even the dogs came and licked his sores. The poor man died and was carried by the angels to Abraham’s side.The rich man also died and was buried, and in Hades, being in torment, he lifted up his eyes and saw Abraham far off and Lazarus at his side. And he called out, 'Father Abraham, have mercy on me, and send Lazarus to dip the end of his finger in water and cool my tongue, for I am in anguish in this flame.' But Abraham said, 'Child, remember that you in your lifetime received your good things, and Lazarus in like manner bad things; but now he is comforted here, and you are in anguish And besides all this, between us and you a great chasm has been fixed, in order that those who would pass from here to you may not be able, and none may cross from there to us.' And he said, 'Then I beg you, father, to send him to my father’s house— for I have five brothers—so that he may warn them, lest they also come into this place of torment.' But Abraham said, 'They have Moses and the Prophets; let them hear them.' And he said, 'No, father Abraham, but if someone goes to them from the dead, they will repent.' He said to him, 'If they do not hear Moses and the Prophets, neither will they be convinced if someone should rise from the dead.'"
_________________________________________________________

You shall not oppress a hired servant who is poor and needy, whether he is one of your brothers or one of the sojourners who are in your land within your towns. You shall give him his wages on the same day, before the sun sets (for he is poor and counts on it), lest he cry against you to the LORD, and you be guilty of sin.
_________________________________________________________

Again I saw all the oppressions that are done under the sun. And behold, the tears of the oppressed, and they had no one to comfort them! On the side of their oppressors there was power, and there was no one to comfort them.
_________________________________________________________

“No one can serve two masters. For you will hate one and love the other; you will be devoted to one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and money.
_________________________________________________________

Look! The wages you failed to pay the workmen who mowed your fields are crying out against you. The cries of the harvesters have reached the ears of the Lord Almighty.
_________________________________________________________

 And behold, a lawyer stood up to put him to the test, saying, "Teacher, what shall I do to inherit eternal life?" He said to him, "What is written in the Law? How do you read it?" And he answered, "You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind, and your neighbor as yourself" And he said to him, "You have answered correctly; do this, and you will live."
_________________________________________________________
 But he, desiring to justify himself, said to Jesus, "And who is my neighbor?" Jesus replied, "A man was going down from Jerusalem to Jericho, and he fell among robbers, who stripped him and beat him and departed, leaving him half dead. Now by chance a priest was going down that road, and when he saw him he passed by on the other side. So likewise a Levite, when he came to the place and saw him, passed by on the other side. But a Samaritan, as he journeyed, came to where he was, and when he saw him, he had compassion. He went to him and bound up his wounds, pouring on oil and wine. Then he set him on his own animal and brought him to an inn and took care of him. And the next day he took out two denarii and gave them to the innkeeper, saying, 'Take care of him, and whatever more you spend, I will repay you when I come back.' Which of these three, do you think, proved to be a neighbor to the man who fell among the robbers?" He said, "The one who showed him mercy." And Jesus said to him, "You go, and do likewise."

_________________________________________________________


Mercy...


d(-_-)b

Saturday, June 25, 2011

All In (Pt. 2) It is in the Bible, not to wrestle your neighbor

All In (Pt. 2) It is in the Bible, not to wrestle your neighbor...

by Roberto Esponja on Saturday, June 25, 2011 at 2:52am ·
Anonymous responses can be made at my blog: http://phreshwater01.blogspot.com/2011/06/all-in-pt-2.html

I really recommend reading  All In (Pt. 1) A little background before we dig in... first. I think it will help, and that's why I did it this way.

Hang in there as you read this, there is a point. If you don't get it, let me know. I'll help you out.
_______________________________________________________

Pt. 2: All roads do not lead to God. In fact, to the contrary, God is the point at which they diverge.

Keep in mind...I NEVER plan any of this stuff. Every time I finish a note I honestly feel I have no more to say and that trite rambling will end my writings, but God has a funny way of working things out, and it looks like we're not done yet.

Over the course of the past week or so, a few unrelated, but as I see very related, subjects have come up. So here we go...As you read, keep in mind what I have already said in Pt. 1 of this.

Know this, that Jesus stated very clearly, he did not to bring peace, but a sword. (I know this runs contrary to the popular ever loving "Buddy Jesus" image we seem to prefer in our culture.)

To that end, and very simply stated he did not want to leave us the option to make him anything other than who he claimed. He speaks clearly to the intention that we should be hot, or cold, but not lukewarm. My personal take on that, is that he is saying, have the heart to accept me or the guts to reject me, but don't pretend that there is a third option. Jesus can not be alright with you, as the Doobie Brothers famously claimed in the 70's.

He was not simply a prophet, or a nice guy, or even free medical care. He was, by intention, either who he claimed to be, or quite the opposite, but that, if we are honest, is the actual decision we are left with.

This extreme divisiveness is not exclusive to Jesus, but is to be found in all of the major religions. So, to say those that desire to believe that "all truth is relative"well...the very nature of that statement is a contradiction of its message, because in that it too is an absolute. The truth is divisive, that's just what it is, regardless of how we may feel about it.

Even those who would like to believe that they can be accepting and inclusive of all (if they are honest) will have to admit non-acceptance and exclusiveness to those having such a claim as Jesus, when he says that no one comes to the Father but by him. That's pretty much, about as cut and dry as it comes.

Christ came for one major purpose, to take on the cost of our sins, and conquer the resulting death of doing so. This is a price which we could never pay, and again I restate, so that we could be saved from ourselves and the wrath we incur by our offenses to God through our rebellion against him. We do not earn it, we can not earn it, or surely this would nullify his very mission making it pointless.

This is the second, and less obvious, major point at which Christianity differs from all other religions, is that NOTHING, in regard to salvation, is required of us except faith. "Salvation" in every other religion requires an effort (works) from us, and by us before it is attainable. This, by Biblical standards, is a lie! The God of the Bible clearly and repeatedly states any attempts at such are exercises in futility and are done in vain. On a personal level, I might go so far as to say they are insulting, not unlike trying to repay someone for a gift they have freely and lovingly bestowed upon you.

Now, please, don't hear what I'm not saying. I believe that CS Lewis was correct in saying,"We do not have souls, we are souls. We have a body." When we develop our vision of people as such, we will begin to develop a greater tolerance for them and their differences from us. We will extend to them the graces and tolerance we too udeservingly received in our sorry state, from God. We often forget about that, and for that I must apologize to those who have experienced such "ungrace". Know that it is not God, but we who are at fault in this.

The Bible says that God loved us long before we loved him. We who claim to be followers, should do no less. That said, however, we can still love somebody and not agree with them. The grace bestowed on us was extended unconditionally and as agents of such we should extend the same.

It is, again, very possible to love others with the same level of inherent value, as God's creations, that we view ourselves as having, without actually having the same belief system.Who would have thought it? Who would have thought It's OK to stand for something and that it's OK if not everyone believes what you do. To believe otherwise to to serve a very small god in deed!

Changing hearts and minds is what God does, not us. Not being able to save ourselves, we would be guilty of pride and arrogance to think that we might actually be able to save someone else. That is our implication when we love others that conditionally, and we risk being guilty of being one more obstacle in their path. Please, forgive us this as well, if this has been your experience. Solo Cristo Salva! (Only Christ Saves!)

Some really cool guy, once said to preach the gospel at all times, and when necessary use words.  I love that...

I say this to those who already profess to believe in Jesus, or to take the claim of Christian. Take the time and effort to know what it is you are professing to believe, and then simply live it. God will do his job. He is not looking for salesmen. Salvation is done through direct marketing, not some pyramid scheme.

What God desires, what he has always desired, is for people to be in right relation to Him, and others. Admit that you may be wrong sometimes (For God's sake show your humanity!) God is bigger than you and will use that too. Then be willing to listen to, and understand others, before you bludgeon them with your own piousness. After all if you don't, aren't you are asking from others what you are not willing to give. It's just called being human, relax.

To those who do not claim to believe in Jesus, I admire you in being honest enough to say so. I think you're wrong in doing so, but I would never ask anyone to confess belief something they they don't actually believe. I certainly don't think Jesus would either. No one believes in something they think is wrong do they? And if you believe you're right, why wouldn't you share that?

Of course, now knowing what you know of me, I would ask you to consider Jesus. That's where my hope lies. I would be willing to share with you the little I do know, if you ask. But where you are with God, is between you and God, and I am more prone to letting God to for you what has done for me, and He has been amazingly patient with me.

As it was so eloquently stated in the movie "Junebug", God loves you just the way you are, but he loves you too much to let you stay that way. And as I am so fond of saying lately, if you can't be honest, you can't really be anything that's worth being.

I don't dole out salvation, that's not mine to administer, and neither is judgment. I'm not called to do either. I am simply to bear witness to the grace I have, and currently am experiencing. The rest is in God's hands, and that is where I will leave it.

I hope this answers the many questions that have been posed to me this week. If not, ask and you shall receive, but you've got to ask.

d(-_-)b

Third beer gone, cigar finished quite a while ago, good night.
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Tuesday, June 21, 2011

Enjoy the Silence



I spent some time in Genesis a while back.Corrected: I spent a long time in Genesis. My original intention was to read the Bible cover to cover, 3 years later, I was still in Genesis. I couldn't shake its depth and imagery. 


It's a profound book to say the least, if you read it correctly...

Monday, June 20, 2011

I have no idea why I posted this, just thought it was funny

I have no idea why I posted this, just thought it was funny.

by Roberto Esponja on Monday, June 20, 2011 at 10:23am ·
I am laughing.

I am laughing out loud.

I am rolling on the floor laughing out loud.

Oh my god, I am rolling on the floor, laughing out loud.

d(-_-)b

Sunday, June 19, 2011

Hope you can relate

We do not live lives of solidarity, we are each daily involved in the lives of others, in one way or another. Consequently, whether in thought, word, or deed, there is always a residual, rippling effect and we can not, it seems, impact the life of another, without impacting our own in someway.

Saturday, June 18, 2011

You are so beautiful

You are so beautiful...


How could you not feel like it was going to be OK after looking at this?

Maddy (Age 6):

I want to take pictures of you.

I will put them in a magazine.

I will sell these magazines to strangers.

That’s right, strangers will be looking at pictures of you…


…only they will think you’re beautiful.

Thanks?  I think...

Friday, June 10, 2011

It really was peanut butter jelly time

It really was peanut butter jelly time... (Originally posted by Roberto Esponja on Friday, June 10, 2011 at 2:34pm)

Today I dug footers, in the sun. It sucked. No, I mean it REALLY sucked.

It's supposed to get to 110 today, and I've had an office job for quite a while now. Not to mention my age and health. But, times are tough here at my house, as they are for most and you gotta do what you gotta do to turn a buck.

Thanks to the generosity of some friends of ours, we had groceries! (Food, Hooray Food!)

As tired as I was at 5am, (and I was pretty tired) I do know by experience, what the June desert weather had in store for me. So, I had the foresight to pack a peanut butter and jelly sandwich for lunch, and enough water to sustain me.

At the beginning of the day, it wasn't too bad out, so I put my sandwich in the shade, and began digging. However, the temperature increased pretty quickly, and by the time lunch rolled around...well my sandwich was in the sun, and in a zip lock bag.

I had been working pretty hard and I was pretty hungry. So, although it was a little less than ideal, I ate it, and enjoyed it none the less.

The End...

http://thumbs.dreamstime.com/thumblarge_548/1287333027EDU17I.jpg

Oh yes, and by the way, if on some strange occasion you are in a situation in which the question is posed," What is the optimal temperature to serve/eat a peanut butter and jelly sandwich?"...Please, allow me to assist in making your decision easier, by removing one of your many options, it is NOT 91 degrees. (Ambient that is, I don't even want to guess how hot the sandwich actually was, sitting in that greenhouse of a zip lock bag.)

When a peanut butter and jelly sandwich is served/eaten at 91 degrees...well, that's a lot more like a peanut butter and jelly smoothie, served between two pieces of bread.

d(-_-)b

Sunday, June 5, 2011

In God's Name

In God's Name (Yep, me working out more stuff)

by Roberto Esponja on Sunday, June 5, 2011 at 1:27am ·

In the name of God we...line our pockets, push our agendas, and move our merchandise, we shame and deceive, imply false obligations, create false expectations, exploit fears and crush spirits.

Everyday, I see these things and far worse being intentionally done by people who use carelessly use the name of the God I serve, to justify them.

I would be a liar, if I said I was not guilty of all of them, on some level. Although not always consciously, the facts are the facts. The difference is, I seek to change, and I can not partake in any religion or institution that condones or justifies any of these things, or contradicts in common practice the principals that they profess.

So, while I may call myself Christian, I must remember that the world calls them Christian as well. And while I see myself as separate, the world sees us as the same.

This is my daily struggle as a follower of the Way, to bear witness to what I know to be true, to show the grace, forgiveness, generosity and love of Christ for those whom I am inclined to do far less. I must always remember that He has done far more for me than I can possibly comprehend. For although we are called the same name by the world, I must strive daily to ensure that we are not at all the same.

I am weak, I know. I will, and have, on many occasions failed, but there can be glory to God in that as well.

The reliance to do these things by my own strength, has always failed me, and when I might appear to have succeeded for a short time, I grew proud. So, I must remain humble, knowing that His strength alone is sufficient to sustain me, and it always has.

d(-_-)b

Friday, July 2, 2010

The Feeling is Mutual

The Feeling is Mutual…

Just what if, we had to treat people in the cyber world like we treat people in the analog world?

I don't mean like flipping people off from the safety of our moving vehicles.

That would be more like all the passive aggressive comments and statuses we see all the time. So I guess in that sense we do.

OK, here's an example:

What  if Facebook, just like friend requests,  sent “unfriend” requests too? Just like friending, you could send your new “unfriend”  a message, and let them know why you have chosen said action.
_________________________________________________________________________

You are sending an unfriend request to: Person "B"

[ ] Personal

[ ] Not Personal

[x] Other

If "Other" please, explain:  Well, to be perfectly honest, we weren't that good of friends in real life, and I think if we're going to remain friends we should end this facebook thing.

[x] Personal Explanation 

(Click here to hide explanation on post.)

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Then they would have the opportunity to accept or decline...of course, since it's not a courtesy we often extend in our day to day relationships, you wouldn’t have to explain anything, you could just unfriend them.

They’d just be informed that you were doing so, instead of looking at the number of friends they have and noticing that the count went from 1,000 to 999, and thus their friend quota was not met.

Maybe they could even have the option to ask,”Why?“.
_________________________________________________________________________


Person "A" has decided to unfriend you. The Other option has been selected.


Explanation: Well, to be perfectly honest, we weren't that good of friends in real life, and I think if we're going to remain friends we should end this facebook thing.


Please select one of the following to respond:

[x] Mutually Agreed


[ ] Reluctantly Agreed


[ ] Agreed, with further explanation requested.


Response:   You're a jerk!

[ ] Personal Response 

(Click here to hide explanation on post.)
_________________________________________________________________________

I mean, since we’re apparently “friends” and all, that seems pretty fair, right?

Again, just like friending, Facebook could heighten the effect even more, by then posting on persons A & B’s walls,
_________________________________________________________________________

Person “A” has unfriended person “B”. 

This decision was: Mutually Agreed

Person "A" Explanation is:  Personal 

Person "B" Response is:  You're a jerk! 



Then person "C" could remark:





Person "C" says: That's probably a good thing. We were all sick of your angry banter back and forth cluttering up our walls and hijacking our posts..
_________________________________________________________________________

It certainly has is flaws, but it's just a what if.


Then again, maybe art is imitating life.
Maybe Facebook is just a reflection of real life, and that's why it allows us to slip away unnoticed, and without explanation.

So sad.

d(-_-)b

(Revised from original posting on July 2, 2010 )