In the past 300 years almost 200 people have died from documented cases of SHC (spontaneous human combustion).
That's 2 people every 3 years! You probably know someone, who knows someone, who's heard of someone that's been affected by SHC.
Let's not wait for another 300 years and 200 more unnecessary tragedies.
No one should have to spontaneously combust.
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You know you want to, so say it already...no one's going to be offended.