Either or Neither

It is far better to err on the side of kindness than of cruelty, for both ourselves and others.

I'll admit it, I've been both, kind and cruel,  at one time or another to people who probably warranted either or neither, and sadly I'm certain those days aren't over yet.

Most of the time when I've been frustrated, or impatient (that's me just being nice to myself there) with someone it's usually due to some sort of misunderstanding, perhaps some poor communications, or (the worst situation in my opinion) some extenuating circumstance, of which I was simply unaware.

Perception...what we perceive of others, and how we are perceived by others, it makes a vast difference. It can turn lovely to ugly pretty fast.

For the most part though being nice, even at my own expense, has left me regretting far less, in both number of occasions and in level of regret, than being nasty. It's also a very different kind of regret that has some built in self-comfort factors for having done what seemed to be the right thing.

There's no comfort in being a dick and especially when later you find out you were totally in the wrong for being so.

I generally try to keep in mind, going into it, that I may regret either choice, or I may regret neither one.
History has shown me that the regret for being nice is far easier for me to endure than the regret I have had from just being a straight up asshole...and that comes all too easily...believe me.  If ever I'm not, then glory be to God, because believe me it's there whether I show it or not.

So really, be good to yourself, but far more important, be good to each other, because a lot of times they are one and the same.

db